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This event happened many moons ago, but nonetheless, it was a defining moment in my life. I started playing field hockey in 7th grade. It was my first time on team sports. I was pretty athletic, but up until that point, all my sports had either been individual, or neighborhood pick-up games. I continued playing through high school. When I was in the 11th grade, I was cut from the team. I was cut from the team, and did not even see it coming. During tryouts, I was a little nervous about being cut, because I knew I was not the best player; but I also had a pretty good idea of how the Varsity and Junior Varsity teams were going to be formed. Since there were only 3 grades in our high school, and I was clearly better than any of the sophomores, I really thought I was pretty safe at making the JV team. NOPE. My name was not there on the Junior Varsity list. I could not believe it. My teammates could not believe it. It was like having a dagger put through my chest. My teammates told me to go talk to the coach. I went to the varsity coach and had a talk with her. The varsity coach told me, I was good enough to play on JV, but not on Varsity. However, she also decided, She would rather have my slot opened on the Junior Varsity team for a younger player, or a Senior, whom she preferred. She would use the Senior - Patti, on JV¸ to deepen her Varsity bench, or bring her up due to team injuries. I was very sad, and hurt. I just wanted to go home and cry. My fall schedule had suddenly changed, but I had already planned on staying after for practice. Since I missed the bus and had to wait for a ride home, I walked to the store with my ex-teammates for our usual afternoon snacks and break. While at the store, someone told me they thought they heard that Patti was going to quit. She wanted a varsity position and was not willing to play on JV. Man, I wanted that position. With the encouragement of my teammates I decided to speak to the coach and ask her for a position back on the JV team. I was scared out of my wits, but decided I had nothing to lose. I really did not expect anything but, “I’m sorry, I’d rather a sophomore on the team, than you.” So after our walk to the store, and a couple of trips to the bathroom, I finally found the courage to go into speak to the coach. I told her, I had heard that Patti was thinking about quitting. She told me, that Patti was not just thinking about it, but that she had actually already quit. Right away I had a flood of emotions – I was equally relieved, and petrified. From fear, I clenched my fists at my side, took a quick breath and decided now was the time to go for it. “Coach”, I said. “ I would like Patti’s place on the team.” She then asked me if I was willing to work hard for it, and dig deeper than I had before. I assured her I would. I walked out of my coach’s office, with my dignity and my position back. I ran to tell my teammates and get changed for practice. Needless, to say, my abilities, and my confidence grew over that year. My coach was also my gym teacher. She saw me grow aggressively in the sports arena. We had co-ed gym, and she saw my attitude about making sure I could not be beat in sports, “just because you are a guy”, mindset. You might beat me, but I was going to give it my all and go out dying! I learned, that in order to get the ball against a guy, you needed to throw an elbow or two to keep the guys out of your space. When they figured out you were serious, they would give you a little space to see your abilities. When they figured out you were good enough, they would leave you alone. I started to play co-ed pick-up volleyball after school w/ many of the top male jocks, AND I held my own! By springtime, I found my groove. I was confident, and good. In several of my gym classes, some of my male jock friends had tried to get beat me in several sports. I usually ended up taking one or two of them out, during the gym period. The male coaches of the school, started coming over to me and my coach, asking me to take it easy on their athletes. My coach/gym teacher was psyched! She knew something I didn’t. She knew that my greatest foe on the field, had been my lack of confidence. She also knew that with my new found confidence, I would be a different and better player on the field! She told me several times, she could not wait to see me on the field, my senior year, practically guaranteeing me a spot. In August, my senior year, I made the team. But just one day after the cuts were made, my coach announced she was leaving the team, and going to coach Bentley College, effective tomorrow. She explained how this was a great opportunity, and promotion for her. “Are you kidding me?” I thought. Needless to say, everyone else on the team had the exact same thought. For the next three weeks, we were more or less self-coached. We finally got a coach, but our team was not real confident in her, or her abilities. She was young, and had not even coached a team yet. We figured we were doomed for the season. Last year’s team was incredible. But we had lost all the star players, over half the team, and a great head coach. Behind our new coach’s back, we decided as a team, that if nothing else, we would have a great camaraderie, and make sure we had fun. We wanted to win a few games, and set a team goal of winning 50%. We had a coach that was in it, at least for the season. By the time we had played five games, we had a few weeks with our new coach. Just before we got off the bus, she stood at the front of the bus. She said, “Ladies, this is a significant game. You have a record of 2-2-1. You have two wins, two losses, and one tie. It is time now to make a decision as a team. Do you want to have more wins, or losses? Or do you want to add another tie, which is not even like playing a game? But you have to decide now, and that will determine how you play. ” That struck a chord with me. I got up, and said, “You know what girls, coach is right. Let’s go out and play our heart out today. Let’s make Coach Mullen, regret she left us, and show her, we don’t need her!” Turns out, we won that game. It was a very difficult game. The other team was a dirty, extremely aggressive, but also a very skilled team. They almost beat us with their cheap tricks, trips, and punches. We held our heads high, we did not stoop to their level of playing, and kicked our determination up a notch. When we walked off the field we walked off bruised and beaten, but nonetheless victorious. With our victory, came more determination. After that win, we gave ourselves a team pep-talk before every game, and we won the rest of our games in our regular season. We ended up in a tie for first place, in the first division of the state of Massachusetts. We went to the play offs. After the first play-off game, I started to get run down. I got a cold, but I kept on practicing and playing. This was our season, and I did not want to let my teammates down. The substitute player for my position, was excited for the opportunity to play for me. She made sure to give her best, at all of our practices. As the playoffs went on, my cold got worse. I developed bronchitis, and then pneumonia. I would be running down the field, coughing, and hacking, during the games. My teammates knew I was sick and learned not to pay attention to me, but the other teams were initially be very concerned for me. My last 4 games were physically awful. When we had a penalty, or timeout, I was usually over the side line, vomiting. It got to the point, that my grandmother, and mother could no longer watch me play. They were too worried I was going to need an ambulance, to take me to the hospital. Looking back, it’s quite funny though - I remember looking at my team in a huddle between halves, and they were very intensely listening to coach. I, on the other hand, was intensely heaving up half a lung. At the quarter-finals, during our pre-game warm up; I was thinking I feel really crummy. I don’t think I want to play today. What does it matter if I quit playing for the remainder of the season? No one will blame me, they all know I have pneumonia. In fact, they have all told me, I should rest on the sidelines, and let my back up, Lisa play for me. As I was having all this self-talk in my head, Lisa came in line behind me, and said, “You know, Alis, if you don’t want to play, or if you feel you need a rest at anytime in the game, let me know. I am happy and ready to help you and the team out.” She was being a great team player, but that was just the kick in the butt, I needed. That comment instantaneously changed my attitude. I sucked up, all the pain, fatigue, and difficulty breathing I was having, and I made the decision, I was going to play. Not only play, but play well, and not give Lisa the satisfaction of playing for me. The poor kid, she never knew what hit her! The ironic thing about that game . . . it was the longest game on record in the state at that time. We played two 45 min halves, as usual, but we tied 1-1. Because it was the playoffs, we went into overtime. I had played the entire 90 minutes of the game. Regulation rules state, if you played the last ten minutes of the second half, you had to play in the overtime¸ with no substitutions. Little did I know that I would end up playing, a double overtime, and then sudden death. I played field hockey for 2hrs 18 min. WITH pneumonia! By the time we got to the sudden death round, I was not the only one on the field, who didn’t care which team won. Most of the players on both teams, just wanted SOMEONE to score, so we could stop playing and go home! We all knew we had played our best, and at that point, that was enough personal satisfaction. Fortunately, for the Woburn Tannerettes, one of our forwards, was a little hungrier than anyone else, and scored the winning goal - by shear drive. Thank God, the game was over! We played two more games, and we won them both. We were Division I State Champions, and I had played every minute of every playoff game. WHEN I WANTED TO QUIT After winning our Final game, we had a huge team party and sleepover. I went to the party and tried to sleepover, but I was just too sick. I left the party, and went home sick, in the middle of the night. I ended up missing the following week of school, and most of the school honors and banquets for the team. I did make it to the Fall Season Sports Banquet, though. We were awarded our various trophies, rings, jackets, etc. for being the Division One State Champions. At that banquet, I was surprisingly awarded the largest trophy in all the fall sports teams, from the Mayor. It was the Unsung Hero’s award, in memoriam of his late wife. It was a very touching moment. I also found out, my team unanimously voted me the recipient. I wanted to give up a couple of times in my field hockey career. When my coach didn’t think I was I was good enough for the team, I didn’t think I was good enough for the team. I wanted to just crawl under a rock, and not re-approach her. When I was sick with pneumonia. I just wanted to go home and get in bed. But I am so glad I did not give up. Those were defining moments in my life. LESSONS LEARNT FROM NOT QUITTING: Get Clear about what you want, and ask for it. If you don’t ask, you’ll never get it. If you are not willing to speak up for yourself, you cannot negotiate on behalf of yourself. You reap what you sow. Action is all that matters – taking action started building confidence. Humility is power, I was humbled enough to want to do better. If it ain’t fun, it ain’t worth doing. And most importantly, Unity is the ONLY way. We were a team without any stars, and without a coach. But our determination, and team spirit, is what got us to winning the state title. Because we had no stars, we learned how to play to everyone’s strengths, and to protect each other’s weaknesses. As a team, we became the “Queen of Victory.” This has recently become a mantra of mine, to increase my inner strength. I am a Queen of Victory! Long Live the Queen! PS - I am not telling you what year that was, since some of you were not even born yet! LMAO